A field full of penises

I love it when Gilly and Mike come round...inevitably we get onto topics such as 'would it be possible to have a field full of penises' which somehow brings up questions such as: would the penises be erect or floppy? Would there be equal representation of all races? Would there, assuming the answer to previous question is yes, then be equal representation of all religions? And disabilities? Are we including balls in this? yes according to Gilly we are- those are what make up the soft spongy underlay (!!!??? I wonder how much thought she's actually given this concept given that she answered that question immediately without hesitation!)

Then we bring lucy into the equation, who comes up with such gems as: Could you have a penis windfarm?! I don't know lucy, could you??? Discussion then continues along the lines of: would the whole windfarm be made from penises? Again do we include scrotums? And are we restricting ourselves to land mass, or do we think they can survive underwater as well? Would they be spongy like anemones, dotted here and there, or would it be a great barrier reef of penises as coral?

Mike, a genuninely nice guy, who I think, at times, despairs of the rest of us (he's going to have so much fun living with us all next year) then poses the question of 'why limit ourselves to penises, what other bodyparts could make up landscapes.
The obvious answer to that is that breasts are hills, lets not go into the feminism about that- bosom of the land and fertility, mother nature, etcetera etcetera.
But it got me wondering. Now surely, if we're thinking in body parts, arms (or legs for that matter) would make better windfarms-look at the symbol for the Isle of Man- legs, arranged together just like a wind turbine (top of)...now that makes sense.

Various discussion formed last night, which resulted in much hilarity from all of us, the penis thing started with Gill telling us about a silly quote she read about penis eye, which got us all wondering until she explained that rather than a venerable disease, it was a feminist thought about the male gaze...that pervy gaze that peter cain used to give every girl at manor is a typical example (yes, he inevitably arose in the conversation too). This led the talk onto Penis Eye as we called it. Mike took this a stage further, talking, though i can't quite remember why, about phones having eyes, and watching you have sex....we weren't drinking, I'd like to take this opportunity to clarify this, which perhaps makes the whole discussion more horrifying. Mike gave phones genders last night, apparently if you have a phone with an aerial, it's a 'boy phone'. We then had a lengthy discussion about whether if a phone is pink (such as Gilly's) it is a girl phone, or a gay phone? Maybe it's a gynaecologist.....maybe it's a gay gynaecologist! And has anyone ever met a gynaecologist that wasn't a man???
No, me neither. And why does Gilly's phone think it knows when she's ovulating, or worse, pregnant??

Quote of the night goes to lucy: Can the penises live underwater? And much wondering of if so, would they be dotted around like anemones, or in a huge coral penis great barrier reef?
Answers on a postcard please.

We topped the night off by finding Chlamydia in my salad plant (inappropriately named caterpiller by either Nic or Gill, can't remember which) and ended the evening by saying goodnight and goodbye to Chlamydia and throwing it out of the window.

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